Tuesday, 25 June 2019

Babies' emissions or mine?

  1. Premise: Everyone has the right to breed as much as they want.
  2. Premise: Every child and living human has a right to opportunity in life and an equal claim on the planet’s resources.
  3. Conclusion: other people get to take my share of the planet’s resources from me.
It’s obvious, isn’t it? All those extra babies add an extra burden on the planet, and if we want to share the planet’s finite capacity equally, then by giving them some we must take away from the claim of people who already exist.
And if people can take it without consent, did it really belong to the first person at all? Why should I pay for someone else’s choice to breed; to subsidise them?
We have to sacrifice one of the first two. The news today is full of the UN rapporteur worrying that we will sacrifice the second. If that’s a bad thing, there’s only one alternative.
It's difficult to allocate resources fairly
If we don’t share the planet’s capacity out equally, updated constantly, then where do we draw the line? Just after I was born, so that I get a full share but people a couple of months younger have to share their parents’ share? Do I inherit my parents’ share, or is that reallocated around the world now that they’re dead? What about that younger person? When his parents die, does he get that full share, or is he left with just the 2/3 of a share he got when his parents’ two shares were divided between the three of them?
These questions all naturally arise in my mind every time someone tells me that in the future we’ll not be able to eat meat or fly abroad because these things are unsustainable. These things give me a lot of joy, but I don’t drive, don’t overconsume clothes or plastic or other pointless tat, and I don’t use central heating. Someone telling me not to eat meat because others will be having a baby is committing an outrage far bigger than me telling them not to breed because I will be going on holiday. The difference is that they want to take my share from me; I want to carry on using it.
The problems of allocating the planet’s resources to a shifting population are not fully soluble. Even if we could judge each person’s actions and intention in order to decide what they deserved, we could pick different criteria depending on our specific conceptions of justice.
Cap and trade is fairest, if only there weren't inequality
One solution is to have a global cap on emissions and auction off the right to emit. This leaves the decision about how much an individual can emit to the market. But that’s a decision in itself: we choose to let the rich have more. If society were perfectly ordered, with just levels of inequality, that might be a perfect solution. But even within any country in the world this is not true, and the problem is confounded by the fact that not all countries will agree to a global market in which ‘their’ share is bought by others. They do not distribute resources internally by markets and do not want to participate in such a system. By formally expanding the ability of wealth to control and buy ever more aspects of human life we expand the impact of inequality.
Rich countries like the USA would still have their worries: what would a global government do with the revenue from such an auction? Why should wealthy Americans agree to pay any more for their overconsumption when they can clearly get away with no paying? If the revenue will be allocated to countries to spend on their citizens, how is it split? Not that giving Americans even large amounts of revenue will help, as they’re so opposed to government in general.
Poor countries will be upset because such a market will reinforce the status quo: rich countries will buy finite resources, which now that they are recognized as finite will leave none available for the poor to buy for development or their own lifestyles. That revenue, in their minds, should all go towards helping them with development which a cap on emissions will prevent them from pursuing.
If we choose to get rid of statement 2
Back to the beginning three statements: I find the conclusion unacceptable. That means either that people don’t get an equal claim on resources and that some will be born with much less opportunity, or that people shouldn’t get to breed freely. I tend towards this latter conclusion. Others agree with me that human rights, dignity and opportunity should not be sacrificed.
            If people continue to breed prolifically (or even at moderate rates, really) then we will continue rapidly to exhaust the planet’s reserves. At the moment we are not in balance with nature, or getting close to crossing some threshold. We are well past the threshold: soils are losing fertility, we are draining aquifers, drying up rivers through melting of mountain ice and destroying biodiversity. We have raked the seas clean of fish, with many ‘stocks’ at less than 1% of what they once were. Living a decent life will become expensive, and rich people will shutter themselves away. That will be within countries, but also between countries.
            We will buy food from poor countries and others in those countries will starve. The strains will make political, religious and ethnic divisions erupt into conflict, and refugees will migrate, looking for somewhere they can live. There will be millions who legitimately meet our criteria for asylum seekers; far more than we few rich nations can comfortably absorb.
            So we will of course start to ignore human rights as currently defined: the right of people to seek asylum, and their right to a good life at home. The fevered dreams of right-wing loons at the moment will in the future become reality: there really will be (potential) billions, and the ‘loss’ of our quality of life if we choose to care for them either at home or abroad will be significant. Land currently inhabited by over half the world’s population could become genuinely uninhabitable: consistent temperatures well over 40 degrees, droughts etc. We are looking at global collapse of society. How could every human right identified by a stable, hopeful and wealthy society be upheld in such a situation?
            We will watch people starve and know that the alternative is simply to starve with them. We will watch and hope desperately that things don’t get so bad that we starve, and our billionaire overlords buy what would be our food. We will watch other countries mistreat refugees and be grateful that they’re keeping the four horsemen away from us for a bit longer.
Choosing to give up on statement 1
            The solution to forcible depopulation through war, famine, pestilence and global destruction is depopulation through ageing. If we just do not breed, our population will drop. Yet to mention this possibility is met with horror. It’s fine if our children live miserable lives in a miserable world, either starving or in constant fear of those who are, to keep our right to create them sacrosanct. We pay tens of thousands for couples to have IVF treatment, and there are complaints, treated as reasonable, that it is stingy of us not to pay more to give infertile couples even more of a chance of having children.
            Why is this regarded as a health issue? Their bodies do all normal activities well enough. They can move, eat, think… it is simply that a life goal is denied them. What if I have a goal to be an Olympic sprinter? Should we fund my training to the tune of tends of thousands of pounds? Yes, people can be depressed and suffer mental ill health from not having children, but we have a term, the mid-life crisis, for those who are getting older and realize that their own hopes and dreams are not possible.
            There are multitudes of poor people (poor by current standards, not by the even more desperate standards of the future) whose dreams can never be hopes, but could be if we spent £10,000 more on giving them a chance.
            We are all, biologically, long-distance runners adapted to do many things, including breeding, that we need self-control to avoid in modern society. However badly someone wants to breed, I can assure that person that I want at least as badly not to grow old. Why do we not treat ageing on the NHS, or treat the ageing crisis as an enormous healthcare issue?
           
            We must weigh up these mutually-exclusive values. The collapse of society and the planetary environment, with lives of misery and suffering for those of our children who survive, sits opposite our selfish need to sate our instinct to breed. Human rights must be sacrificed: do we sacrifice all of them, or just the one about the right to bear children?

Sunday, 26 May 2019

Independence


In which I argue that independence not only an overlooked virtue, but one of the most important.
Many years ago the poet Milton wrote that the way to ensure that we reach truth in our opinions and beliefs is through a free marketplace of ideas. Milton was a brilliant poet and his idea on free speech stuck with us, via the philosopher John Stuart Mill and many others. Back then Milton was right. People lacked access to information but had plenty of time to ponder what information they did get. The restriction was on the flow of information, and the application of intelligence would do the rest if only they could get the facts to assess.
We have come to idolize the free press as a tenet of our faith in democracy and forgotten that it was intended as a means to an end. We are supposed to allow a free press in the service of truth, but now we treat a free press as a goal in itself.
The modern world is very different from Milton’s world. We have negligible restrictions on the flow of information. The restriction on reaching the truth is too much freedom: we are flooded with information. We no longer have the time, ability or inclination to consider all the information we encounter and judge its truthfulness. We have an overabundance of speech; we have fake news and our willingness to believe it.
What we need now is not the freedom to publish and publicise widely anything at all in mass media outlets, but an independent media. The best route to truth is to dispassionately consider what information you have access to, and share only facts and conclusions that this careful analysis has left standing; and for everyone else to do the same. This is how scientific literature works: researchers are expected to analyse their own findings and present a balanced conclusion with backing arguments. That’s how to find truth, which is the purpose of science. The scientific world is, of course, aware of problems with this model: of fake results, biased referees and non-publication bias. Similar problems afflict the rest of the world, but outside of science no-one seems to have categorised the problems… or even care about them. But truth is our goal even outside of science.
We need independence in publishing: articles disinterested in either side of an argument, but interested in truth. Disinterested people can still be money-grubbing mediocrities like Mark Zuckerberg or Rupert Murdoch. They can promote biased articles in pursuit of their fortunes; they can choose a side despite not caring about the directly relevant issue. It is the speech itself that must be disinterested, unbiased… independent.
Modern free speech is about producing ego-stroking tripe that serve no great purpose; articles are written to be addictive. They pander to instinctive needs, seducing us with clickbait into a brief emotional hit of curiosity, outrage or whatever other drug is being sold. Even if it is news, the story is chosen and worded to appeal to the same base(/ic) instincts. It makes us satisfied with ourselves and reinforces our opinions, implicitly telling us that we are sensible and on the right side.
The way for us really to be sure that we’re on the right side is to have our opinions challenged and to learn new facts. Even news that is new is often carefully chosen from all the possible information out there to reinforce ideas not teach us better ones; to keep people in a rut, not free them. Our inbuilt biases – ‘motivated reasoning’ – are the greatest pitfall for us; this is why ‘intelligent’ people can be more resistant to learning than less intelligent people: they are better at defending their current beliefs. They can perform complex intellectual feats but not choose sensible ways to use that ability; they have the intelligence of a computer, not a programmer. Incidentally, it’s an easy trap to fall into when portraying intelligent people: think of them as powerful tools to be used by normal people. In some stories this is a good reminder that wisdom and ability are different, but more often it’s a weird dehumanising stereotype that portrays intelligence as a disability. Most intelligent people are better at spotting whether they are being manipulated, not worse.
In what other areas, outside of a free press, might independence have value?
Law
The rule of law is the most obvious. Justice is pretty much the difference between barbarism and civilization… although even apes, monkeys and dogs have a sense of justice. Our legal system is predicated on independent judges. Judges who favour one side over another are incompetent or corrupt (or American supreme court justices, appointed for political opinions not for justice). To reach justice we let each side argue their case as strongly as they can and have the judge decide which arguments are best. We don’t trust people to be disinterested in their own cases, and we allow both sides of the argument to be presented strongly, to prevent the judge getting stuck in a rut and thinking only of one side of the case.
The French, as an example, do it differently. They have an investigating judge whom they trust to investigate the case and consider the arguments, like both sides in our combative system, and then also make a judgement.
Either way we need an independent judge. We don’t respect the rule of law any more, as I have written about before. Our judges are called traitors for upholding it. Partly, our laws no longer deserve respect. Our society is poorly regulated; we have plenty of laws in some areas that are not fully enforced, ensuring that some privileged people get away with breaking the law, and are lionized for their worldly success, while others suffer and are demonized for daring to do wrong. This judgement in enforcement is partly a necessity because of the vast underfunding of the police and the courts. In other areas, such as electoral fraud, we have insufficient law. Things that ought to be wrong have never been considered, and now that people have done them and attained power or success they use that power to lobby to be able to continue doing it and to escape opprobrium for doing it.

Sport
As in law, so in sport. There are rules, people break them both accidentally and deliberately, and we need a referee to spot infractions and decide on penalties. When the rewards, both money and glory, go to the winners, people will bend the rules just that little bit further than they allow others to bend them back. People forgive themselves most easily, and some will do whatever they can get away with. So we need people whose job it is to enforce the rules: without rules, the sport doesn’t exist any more.
And yet more and more we distrust referees. We chant about them, insult them, question their decisions and yet fear the alternative: video referees, able to see almost everything but ‘slowing the game down’. We all want the referees’ decisions to go our way; we worry about a referee who might catch everything. It never occurs to commentators that it is players’ fouls that slow the game down; we wouldn’t want to blame our own side for something bad. It is the system of judging that just takes too much time and effort: let it pass, we think… unless it hurts us.

Regulation
              Outside the realm of law there is still a murky world of regulators: organisations typically sponsored by government, but sometimes industry bodies, that have some power of judgement over their members. There are regulators for doctors, nurses, solicitors, accountants, electricity, water, elections, banking and so on. They have no real power to do any good. Their supposed ability to make judgements is unacceptable: anyone on the wrong side of such a judgement would never accept it as an unbiased, reasonable decision. Ever fearful of legal challenge, they fall back to only what the law is already very clear on. They do not guide an industry: they search for excuses. There is a big range of action that is not the absolute best, but is not demonstrably illegal. Regulators rarely dare even venture into condemning the probably illegal: if they ever bother going beyond the law, it is in the form of non-binding best practice suggestions and vague language filled with ‘unless not necessary’ and similar get-out phrases.
              This is because we do not want our judgement impinged on by a regulator. We do not trust regulators to be impartial: our own judgements are always excellent decisions, perfectly balancing needs versus desires: business necessities against aspirations. We no longer trust or care for independence.

Art
The art world is a world apart from normal people. This is the world of transnational tax-haven based buyers and sellers; Conservative party donors and treasurers, Russian oligarchs (sometimes all the same thing) and obscene prices. Art is a luxury good; people buy it to show off how wealthy they are, and maybe as an appreciating asset. No-one can possibly get £71m worth of joy from an ugly metal rabbit; or even $81m worth from Monet’s Meule. I have more beautiful photos on my wall and on my hard drive, and although I’ve visited some spectacular places, you can find photos like mine online for free.
But the art world relies on dealers; experts who authenticate the provenance of an artwork, for old masters, and who confirm a price range. The Last Leonardo, sold for £341m, was probably not by Leonardo. The authenticators get work from customers by confirming high values; only those who confirm high values progress in their careers.
Although the trust in authenticity might not be warranted, nonetheless the experts create trust in the market between buyers and sellers. Without them, the art market, where rich people launder money and swap vast sums for ugly trinkets, would collapse. In this case, that might be a good thing. But they’d find some other way, and galleries and museums would struggle to collect art of genuine historical importance.

Audit
The whole purpose of audit is to provide an independent check of a company’s accounts (or other audited information). It tells investors that they can base decisions on the information they see.  Without audit, events such as the Tesco scandal or the collapse of Patisserie Valerie wouldn’t be scandals: they’d be normal.
Beyond statutory audit, there is a huge range of professional services offered by companies and consultants that involve assuring the quality of something. Accountants and lawyers do ‘due diligence’ on suppliers, buyers and potential purchasers. We rely on solicitors to handle money for us when we buy a house, to ensure that no-one cheats someone else. This blends into regulation, and it’s a huge part of our world. We need all these people to be independent. Audit and professional services are central to the economy. And yet there are three reviews of audit, as the Big Four dominate the market and are perceived not to be independent.

Advertising
I’m not shy about how much I loathe advertising. Its purpose is to distort rational decision-making and introduce, in economists’ language, imperfection into the market. The very first advertisement might have been simply information that something called toothpaste existed, although I’m sure that traders have been lying about the products for millenia. But modern advertising isn’t about conveying information about which we can make independent decisions; it’s about playing emotions. Its aim is to destroy our independence.
This trend is most visible online. There are so many consumer goods out there that we cannot make perfect decisions about them. We can’t know everything and be sure of winnowing out the dross. We turn to websites and companies that promise to aggregate and rank the options. In exchange we pay more: curator companies charge for their services. Aggregators take a cut. And then sellers try to play their algorithms: insurance companies, for example, release a multitude of similar policies so that they clog up the front page of a search on insurance aggregators’ websites. People are then much more likely to select one of that company’s options rather than compare the genuinely different options available.
We don’t just try to find independence in companies. We return to word-of-mouth, and in the modern networked world that’s not just our friends, it’s ‘influencers’ and bloggers. We try to find people who have done the hard work of working through the multitude of possibilities and whose tastes match our own. But, in the least subtle demonstration of the corrupting influence of advertising, as soon as an influencer becomes vaguely influential, that person is snapped up by advertisers and paid to promote products, losing the independence that many people thought they had found. All that is left is the ‘entertainment’ of the person’s performance of independence: an actor pretending to be what we need.
Companies chase the holy grail of brand trust, trying to cut out the influencer middleman. But all for image: they calculate how greedy they can be whilst still keeping hold of dedicated consumers. Some aim for the very moral niche, but it’s still a business strategy.
Companies want to make us like their products without going through the hard work of making them high quality but low cost. They fund advertising, which makes us willing to buy a product for more than it is worth, and they quantify this value and call it branding, an intangible asset. If we go through the accounts of the largest companies in the world (that have been purchased, as they’re not allowed officially to account for it unless the price has actually been paid) we’ll see billions, if not trillions, of pounds worth of brand assets: a ready-made figure for how much consumers are being taken for a ride. One estimate puts it at over $4.5 trillion in the USA.


Independence in the economy
              All these examples show that independence is central to society and the economy. Without independence in these areas trust and fairness would be lost, and without trust there can be no markets, and without fairness there is no society.
              The list of regulations is huge and unimaginable, and that’s part of the problem. Until Grenfell tower block burned, very few people would have been able to mention regulations about the combustibility of building cladding, or safety regulations about how to install it. For many, the host of similar regulations is an example of government-gone-mad; the nanny state blocking good business. But we need people to check information for us, because we cannot be experts in everything in a world full of complexity. Yes, it’s true that we didn’t build an empire on health and safety regulations: ‘we’ built it on the hard work and early deaths of the poor. We didn’t need regulations when ‘we’ fought off wolves and bears with stone axes, but modern materials science is hugely more complex than chipping flints. Until recently, drowning was a very common cause of death: children who couldn’t swim were allowed near open bodies of water.
              Those lifeguards at swimming pools and beaches, and the signs everywhere else saying ‘no lifeguard on duty’ or ‘deep water: danger of death’ seem silly to adults who never knew someone who drowned, but they’re there for a reason. No-one drowns, so they seem silly, but no-one drowns… any more.


Independence might therefore seem like a good work virtue. Something to cultivate at work, and then to relax away from at home, where you can indulge in passion, drama and bias all you like. For those who hate rational thought, this might be an appealing idea. Sadly, it’s not true.
Hans Rosling points out to us, via his beautiful lectures and his book, that we are wrong about important things in the world because of our love of drama. He phrases it very well:
Our brains often jump to swift conclusions without much thinking, which used to help us avoid immediate dangers. We are interested in gossip and dramatic stories, which used to be the only source of news and useful information. We crave sugar and fat, which used to be life-saving sources of energy when food was scarce… our cravings for drama are causing misconceptions and an overdramatic worldview….
We still need these dramatic instincts to give meaning to the world… we should not cut out all sugar and fat [or drama]. But we need to learn to control our drama intake.’
Drama, like fat and sugar, might be an essential ingredient for a fulfilled life, but we crave far more than we need and an excess of it rapidly causes us trouble. And like fat and sugar, it doesn’t matter if you consume it at home only: too much is still too much. You can get addicted to emotionality even if you start off abstaining at work, just as you can with alcohol.
The word ‘addiction’ might seem excessive. It’s not. We know from decades of research that emotional intelligence is hugely important to thrive in life: not just to do caring, communicative jobs, or even to earn money, but to be happy and cultivate good relationships. We are an emotional species and those emotions can control us. Some people feel bad and take it out on others, spreading pain and discontent. People feel hurt and lash out, whether the target deserves it or not. People let emotions govern their motivation, appetite, health and decisions. You can feel short of money through impulse-buying, or short of friends through lashing out.
Whole books have been written about the myriad ways in which the ability to maintain a bit of distance and be reasonable helps all aspects of our personal lives. There are even possibilities that it could help with serious disease: depression is a state of feeling the worst about life and its possibilities, and anti-depressants are known to reduce ‘affect’ (i.e. emotion). They don’t make people happy; they give them a chance to be dispassionate and see things slightly more reasonably. Some people find that this robs life of joy… but depression is a horrible condition to live through in which it’s hard to find much joy anyway. A bit of distance can be a good thing in a depressing world.
Then, of course, there’s risk management. Yet again, we have tides of research and waves of more popular books about systemic biases in human thought. The deservedly popular Thinking Fast and Slow tells us that emotional reasoning is behind some of the greatest disasters of all time. People get caught up in the mood and fail to raise, or listen to, valid concerns. A ‘can-do’, positive attitude, so widely prized across business, is actually a route to failure. Thinking about failure is the way to avoid it. That requires the ability to think independently: to be independent from team-mates, and independent from one’s own hopes and desires.

Politics
Finally, we get to the one subject to rule them all. Politics is where we make or break all the other areas already mentioned: how we exert control and bend them to our will. We live in a democracy, but it’s failing. We have made a disastrous decision recently, and we’re not the only ones. People, especially young people, feel failed by democracy and wonder if authoritarianism might be better. National leaders across the West and beyond express admiration for ‘strong’ (i.e. bad) leaders. Part of this is that the baby boomer generation has failed its successors, mortgaging the future, paying themselves massive pensions using government debt that others will pay off, and because they’re a baby boom they can get away with it. But perhaps the modern world is recognizing a greater truth:
If you want a people who govern themselves then the people must be able to govern themselves.
It reads like a tautology. But people who can’t think independently and rationally enough to control their individual actions can’t do the same for collective action either. The idea of the wisdom of the crowd assumes that we’re all making rational decisions based on limited information, not that we’re making irrational decisions with unlimited information. It is our independence that is key; introduce bias and you can skew the whole process.

Our whole society is built around introducing bias. Politicians want to make us like them as a shortcut that is easier than doing the hard work of finding solutions to intractable problems in which some will inevitably do worse than others. Everyone finds it easier to create bias than to do the hard work of being genuinely better in an independent analysis. We’re aware of this possibility: that’s why sports fans scream that the referee is biased. But we don’t consciously value independence.
In politics we have seen dodgy funding, illegal campaign funding and activity, illegal overspending, targeted advertising, barefaced lies, stonewalling to avoid real debate, all unregulated. Where things were already illegal, the law wasn’t enforced. There’s not conspiracy, I think: just foolish people unwilling to rock the boat. Many of these are already insufficiently illegal. Electoral overspending by hundreds of thousands of pounds, for example, warrants a fine that is a fraction of that amount: a minor cost of doing the work for those with that sort of money to throw around.
These things all combine around the issues of our independence, and that of our media institutions. The lies and illegality weren’t challenged enough because broadcasters feared that such independent judgement would be regarded as bias: they think that avoiding making a judgement is being independent. That isn’t true: that’s an abdication of responsibility. If all our courts refused to convict criminals, we wouldn’t call them independent. We’d say that they were on the side of the criminals. Independent requires judgement.
If supposedly respectable institutions whose job it is to assess and disseminate information can’t put out the truth, how can someone struggling to make ends meet at a demanding job and with a demanding family find the truth in his spare time? No wonder people discarded the goal of truth and decided to use what was left to them: emotion.
People are helped in this by a society that promotes emotionality. Our heroes are emotionally illiterate fools. Soap operas are cesspits of the most bilious drama, created by whole rosters of characters who belong in mental homes for the disturbed. Even in less nauseating art, the last couple of decades have fully explored the idea of the flawed hero, and even as the heroes have become super-powered, physically, those emotional flaws remain or are worse. The transformers films, or ‘Guardians of the Galaxy vol 1’, exemplify this perfectly. The transformers are super-powered toddlers who become friends with a toddler in an adolescent body. Although I’ve met more mature toddlers. Their misbehaviour and awkwardness are supposed to be funny but were just cringeworthy.
Advertisements promote impulsivity. Packaging and shop layouts are carefully designed to tempt us. Algorithms guess what we’ll want next and ask us if we want to buy it. And political messages find out our fears and promise to remove them; or our hopes and promise to achieve them. I might like half a party’s policies, making it a poor choice for me, but it will send me only advertising about that half. Not only might I never find out about the other half, but I will assume that the half I like are its priorities, because those are the ones I will perceive it to be pushing most.
Since parties rarely enact a tenth of what they promise (and of what the Conservatives promise, less than a tenth will achieve the goals they claim), I could easily vote for a party that will do nothing for me.
I will ruin my life, and my country, unless I can take back control. Not by voting for the slogan, but of my own mind. We need to control our emotional impulses and seek the truth. How will we take back control? From whom? What control? We can’t just let the truth come to us, or even treat what information comes our way with caution. We must seek the information that no-one has sent our way. When other people are in control of our information, they control our minds. We must be independent, sovereign humans of our own. Without that, all talk of freedom is wasted. We are not our emotions: we are the thoughts that control and temper the emotions.
When we have tempered our emotional selves, we will be the steely opponents that the demagogues fear. We will realize that there’s no shame in working together, as a country or international community, because our independence is internal and cannot be lost: it’s inside of all of us, waiting to save our lives.

Monday, 22 April 2019

Toxic sexism - poor Eric


Eric Butts is apparently a fan of Star Wars. So much a fan that he cried at some aspect of a recently released film trailer. And, inevitably, some bullies piled on. One comment that achieved particular fame called him undateable, and he was compared to the right-wing nutters who call themselves ‘incels’.
This reveals to us a whole world of judgement of men that it’s easy to overlook. Men tend to have deep hobbies; more than women, they dive into a subject and devote themselves to it. It’s an autistic trait but also a masculine one. And society mocks people who are odd, or take seriously something that the rest of us don’t care about.
There are nerds who have endured mockery, and many people who have skimped on or hidden life-fulfilling interests in order to avoid mockery. It’s not entirely a male thing, but it is more men than women, just as most traditionally feminist issues affect more women than men.
Alongside this distaste for loving anything too much is a default hierarchy of value in which art focussed on drama and relationships is regarded as more mature, and art focussed on stories in which things happen (‘action’) is derided. Men are naturally drawn to the physical; they have a greater tendency to have good spatial intelligence and less interest in, and aptitude for, emotional intelligence. What naturally interests them is the ‘lesser’ art.
The discussion of societal approaches to drama and relationships would also be incomplete without noting that the default way of living is to pursue an exclusive relationship and devote oneself to a spouse until children arrive, at which point they cease to become the most important goal in life and become the most important part of life. This approach to life probably appeals to a great many people naturally, but we’re indoctrinated into it so that we scorn and reject anyone who wants something else. And it’s very much men who are more inclined to explore other things in life, whether it’s exploring the world and adventuring, obsessing about fantasy stories or fooling around in relationships without ‘getting serious’.
These are valid interests, but there’s a constant undercurrent of negative judgement. It starts with the descriptions we use: a ‘serious relationship’ is one that fits our mould for marriage and child-rearing. If it’s merely life-affirming and wonderful but unlikely to last it’s regarded as trivial, even though nothing lasts forever. Then there’s the ongoing chuntering about when someone will ‘grow up’. Boys and men are regarded as immature until they learn to pursue the things that women are more drawn to: marriage and children.
I’ve been in relationships where we spent most of our time discussing (arguing) the relationship and almost no time actually enjoying it. Is it immature to fool around with friends and enjoy life a bit, but mature to take relationships so seriously, and analyse them so carefully, that there’s no time left for doing things?
You might not regard these things as important. It’s hard to understand how the constant undermining of your own desires, mockery or displeasure can build up. How over time someone can subconsciously and consciously dissociate from what he really wants and learn to behave in a scripted way imposed on him. But that’s exactly the argument we make about feminist issues: small things add up to a culture that is oppressive.
You might regard these things as aspects of patriarchy, and not news to feminism. Feminists abhor the pressure on women to have babies too. But these issues are not limited to women, and it’s hard to relate them to the root of the word ‘patriarchy’, which means rule by men. Men might have more power, but a culture that punishes male traits hasn’t arisen specifically because of universal male power. It’s just an oppressive culture that also happens to give too much of the power to some men. More and more I think that the sex-related terms of feminism and patriarchy are outdated and implicitly exclude hugely important issues. In the end, though, this is arguing over words and not ideas. So let’s move on.
There is a class of advertisement that mocks men. Portrayed as incompetent, these men can’t even take pride in having some value from their appearance. Women might often be mere ornaments, but some advertisements have a man whose role is to be an awful human being, creating or failing to solve problems that the woman, with the product, finds effortless to manage. Women complain that this is insulting to women, because they are told to care for men… and yet reject any suggestion that chivalry and protecting women might be onerous to men.
Returning to dedication to a subject, our culture of long working hours seems, in my limited experience, to be more strictly enforced on men. Women might feel constrained by society’s expectations that they devote themselves to family, but men are constrained by society’s expectation that they show their devotion by working their lives away. Household commitments are an unacceptable excuse; men must waste their lives on labour that isn’t even for them. Neither men nor women are allowed interests or hobbies into adulthood; these are regarded as weird quirks that at best are tolerable and at worst interfere with the ‘mature’ business of meeting cultural expectations of raising children.
To call society’s focus on having more children somehow more patriarchal than matriarchal is wrong. It is patriarchal only in the sense that men happen to have power in our society and are therefore by default more responsible for society’s culture. But it doesn’t benefit men, and it’s promoted at least as much by broody women as reactionary men. There are many men who find the love of their life, have children, and then feel left out because their lover no longer devotes much time to them, but instead to their children. Angry feminists dismiss this as yet another example of needy men. But all these insulting attitudes to men start to sound very biased; more like a relationship drama in which someone who is already upset is looking for ways to criticise. If you buy into an ideal you’re not particularly disposed towards on the basis that, yes, two people in a mutually-supportive relationship can share and enjoy so much more life than an individual can, it can be profoundly depressing to find that you were sold a lie.
Many women use relationships as a tool to achieve the true goal: a ‘happy, normal’ family of husband and children, with children the real purpose and joy. The man is merely incidental. The relationship is no longer one of mutual support, but one in which he supports more and more, and gets less and less back. Focussing on whiny men who want something back ignores entirely the supposed mutuality of the initial relationship.
There are many men who feel that their relationships have died. Mid-life crises aren’t just about lost youth, but the dawning realization that life isn’t what it should be for a multitude of other reasons. Is it mature to give up on your dreams and support others just because other people tell you that supporting others should be your dream?
We could have a cultural message that having a child is a massive commitment, a life-distorting decision that will cost you many of your current friendships and relationships as well as your health and money. Instead it’s a default that people fall into. That suits people who were always more likely to be focussed on having children, but is a disaster for everyone who might have wanted other excitements in life.
When we judge men’s desirability we often include things such as status and wealth that aren’t part of the person. Women complain about men who look only at their beauty and not their personality… and yet there are also women who think of men as accessories; you pick a man for his money and reflected status, have his babies and care about your children rather than your husband. That’s not objectification, but it also ignores all aspects of who the man actually is. His personality is mostly irrelevant.
                Is it awful that men are pressured to make money as a substitute for being decent people? Is it worse than women regarding beauty as an acceptable substitute for virtue (and I mean real virtue, not sexual repression)? That depends on your view of capitalism, greed and their effects on society and the environment. But I think the effect on men is significant, and less widely considered. Is it patriarchy that tells women to value wealth and then makes men feel inadequate because they’re never wealthy enough? No.
                I think it might be biologically hard-wired for women to find wealth and power attractive. That doesn’t make it right. Men are biologically hard-wired to find women’s bodies attractive, and to feel more sexual urges than women. We don’t use that as an excuse to justify behaviours that hurt other people or make society worse: we still condemn objectification. Women even sneer at pathetic men constantly begging for sex: feminists worry about the men who intimidate women with the possibility that they will indulge their need without consent. But no-one considers the burden of constantly living with an unmet need. It’s not right to use other people, but it’s still awful to need something you can’t attain.
                The default position is that a mature man is one who ignores that need, is lucky enough not to have a powerful version of it, or has resigned himself to an unfulfilled life. Women expect fidelity not just emotionally, but physically: many find the idea of their partner using pornography revolting. Human biology is hugely variable, but the culturally acceptable version of a sex drive is not to have one. Because men tend to have more than women, it’s the opposite of a feminist issue. This might have arisen from patriarchal religions, but it’s now a problem for men, promoted and maintained by women.

That's been enough writing. We've only briefly touched on some of these issues: long enough to trigger more thoughts, I hope. But I hope the main point is clear: our cultural problems are broader than one oppressed group. We have an oppressive, imperfect society not because a broad swathe of people are perfectly privileged, but because everyone is oppressed in different ways. Sexism is just one way, and it cuts against both sexes. This is because humans tend to be thoughtless and unpleasant, especially to those who are different in any way. Tolerance isn't just a high concept to be applied to the famous things, like religion or sex. It's needed in every little moment of life, because little moments add up to whole lives.

Taking stock of a public figure: market-maker or made by market failure?

       I’m torn over whether Gary’s Economics, and Gary Stevenson himself, are a good thing for or a symptom of the problems society faces...